The weekend’s almost here!
You’ve probably been glued to the TV screen every evening catching up on all the Olympic action but just in case you’re out of the loop our American’s have been performing well. Of course everyone’s attention has been ensnared by Colorado’s teenage snowboard bum & gold medalist Red Gerard who managed to oversleep following a Brooklyn Nine Nine binge and still nab himself a gold medal.
So in honor of our young gold medalist we’ve created our own Olympics comprised entirely of videos of skiers and snowboarders failing their way through the week winning nothing but medals of Internet gold.
The 2018 Olympics of Snow Fails
As they say of the dating scene in the sticks of Montana, “the odds are good but the goods are odd!” and our Olympic selection committee found themselves in the midst of a similar situation. The discussions were heated but we have settled upon the final standings for Internet immortality.
Since this is the Internet we’ve stretched the rules to include 5 podium finishers and took creative liberties with the medal’s atomic properties & overall worth.
Thank you for watching. Please, enjoy.
“The East Coast face shot”
“D-fence Wins Championships!”
“The Neglected Little Brother”
With a winning score of around perfect, the cannon-shot skier out of nowhere seems to have taken our judges by as much surprise as our audience. This is the clear winner and since physical currencies are worthless in the coming Internet Spring, it’s worth far more for our athletes to earn a Bitcoin instead. Unsure of his pending medical bills, we hope the speculators on Wall Street will boost his medal’s worth once again.
Thank you for watching. See you in four years.